Chapter 5

    Challenges Like This Aren't Good

    One day, he's going to have to spank her until her bottom turns blazing red.

    He pondered as he watched a procession of animals walking in the beautiful gardens of the Zhengyang Palace. The ducks, having been granted their freedom, happily went down to play in the pond, while the chickens, still frightened, were captured in cages and given grain. They hungrily pecked at the food, clucking noisily. Heaven, please have mercy... Beyond ducks and chickens, there were also pigs... And that! A buffalo! She took the opportunity to rescue a buffalo from the slaughterhouse. Zhao Yicheng felt a headache so severe he had to ask for pain relief.

    "Dear, look, a buffalo! Let's allocate a part of the stable for it, please?"

    Chen Hua covered her mouth, laughing joyously, and brought a gosling for him to name. She was blooming like a small flower in the soft sunlight, her eyes sparkling, cheeks flushed a tender red, looking so excited, inviting smiles in return. The little gray gosling honked softly at Chen Hua, as if knowing she was its benefactor. Thus, it was wary of everyone but affectionate only towards Chen Hua. Zhao Yicheng thus offhandedly chose a name: "Let's call it Xiao Nao."

    "Xiao Nao... Nao, as in brain? Why choose this name?"

    "When it responds to its name, I'll be reassured that its keeper still has a brain."

    "Oh..." Chen Hua nodded, then turned sharply, "Are you secretly scolding me?"

    "Not at all. You must be smart since you hardly use it. I'm complimenting you." Zhao Yicheng shook his head but got slapped by her anyway. Chen Hua, as the victor, smiled widely because, in addition to keeping ducks and geese, she had also earned the right to reclaim the entire bed as her own.

    "Find your own place to sleep tonight, dear."

    "Aren't you afraid the baby in your womb might get sick?" he asked in a calm, indifferent voice. "Haven't you heard? The night air is cold. Pregnant women shouldn't sleep away from their husbands. The balance of Yin and Yang energy in the body will be disturbed. If you refuse to sleep with me, it could affect the child."

    "Really?" Chen Hua hesitated before turning to Diao Gonggong for confirmation. The old eunuch stuttered, and seeing the young master's rapid blinking, he nodded in agreement.

    "Indeed, Taizi Fei."

    For someone like Chen Hua, who believed mere hugging could lead to pregnancy, she was deeply conflicted. Just waking up in the morning to find themselves hugging was irritating enough, and now he insisted on sharing a bed again. Just then, Xiao Nao squawked loudly as if nodding in agreement. She gently stroked its feathers before reluctantly agreeing. "Alright then. Just because I care about the baby. But we mustn't touch each other, or I might end up with twins."

    "Agreed."

    Diao Gonggong looked at Taizi for an explanation, but Zhao Yicheng had already stiffly walked away, his shoulders shaking.

    ……………….

    Ever since when, dusk became a time of dread for him. Zhao Yicheng decided to accept an invitation to a lavish feast hosted by a prominent nobleman. It might sound weak and foolish, but he needed a breather before he lost all patience. This banquet became increasingly lively because the host managed to invite all three princes. The Second Prince, Zhao Tianzi, being naturally jovial, indulged fully, surrounded by friends flaunting their latest treasures like jade pendants or snuff bottles made of agate stone. In contrast, the First Prince sat drinking gloomily, exuding dark vibes from his brooding gaze that kept everyone at bay.

    Whispers abounded that the seemingly perfect marriage was already in trouble. The handsome Taizi had fled to the merry gathering after just one night in the bridal chamber, leaving his bride alone.

    The Third Prince wasn’t much for festivities and stayed only as courtesy demanded. Therefore, when the banquet began, after a while, he retreated to the northern balcony, gazing at the stars, lost in his calculations.

    “Third Brother.”

    A voice called out. Zhao Yongkang turned, recognizing his eldest brother’s voice. "Taizi, why have you left the feast?"

    "I'm bored."

    "If bored, then return to the palace. Sister-in-Law must be waiting."

    "I can't stand it. If I stay with her any longer, I fear I might..." Zhao Yicheng clenched his jaw, his face tense with utmost stress, pacing before stopping at the balcony's edge, gripping the railing tightly. Sometimes he squeezed it, then let go, as if trying to contain himself.

    "The advice you gave didn’t work. I can’t even breathe when I see her."

    "Big Brother, I'm not married yet, so I can’t offer much advice. Intimacy between spouses may be awkward, but over time, lovebirds become acquainted and intimate, leading to sweet nights."

    "I have no intention of touching her."

    Zhao Yongkang was surprised, then let out a long sigh, "If you can't get along, perhaps it's better to divorce now while it’s still early."

    "No! Absolutely not," Zhao Yicheng roared, taking a deep breath before venting incoherently in a way his younger brother couldn’t keep up with.

    "She's adorable, so adorable! Why is she so adorable like this? Her eyes are so big, her cheeks plump. When she looks up to talk, her plump little figure, her movements, her hands so soft, her sweet scent delighted my nose. My heart races uncontrollably. I can’t take it. I give up."

    "Huh?"

    "I'm tortured. One part of me wants to flee far away, but another part wants to scoop her up and throw her on the bed. I’ll hold her countless times."

    Upon hearing this, Zhao Yongkang felt dejected on his behalf. If marriage leads to madness like this, he doesn’t want to marry. "Then why don't you just consummate the marriage and be done with it?"

    "I can't. If I straightforwardly say what I want, she’ll only get smugger."

    Damn it… Zhao Yongkang quickly sensed something was amiss and prompted a heart-to-heart. "Tell me, what happened between you and Sister-in-Law?"

    Zhao Yicheng shifted to lean back, resting his elbow against the balcony railing, head tilted back, then began recounting everything at length, from their days in Western City to the recent rice distribution for flood victims. Initially, Zhao Yongkang nodded along, but as the story progressed, his jaw dropped in disbelief.

    "Big Brother... Are you serious? A duel? What are you and your wife playing at?"

    "At first, I didn't care much, but upon reflection, if something were to happen between us because of a wager, it would be meaningless. I don’t want to force her..."

    "And what if your wife herself also desires you?"

    "As long as she doesn't say it, I will not do anything," Zhao Yicheng breathed in deeply. "Third Brother, join me for a drink tonight, will you?"

    "Of course... Once we finish drinking, I'll leave as well…," Zhao Yongkang turned to order a servant to bring the liquor before starting to inquire about things he hadn't experienced himself. "Tell me, Big Brother, is marriage good or not?"

    "One day, you'll understand why I'm so miserably troubled like this... Her smile is overwhelmingly influential. You can't win against it, remember that."

    "I'm not interested in marriage yet, nor is our Second Brother... Only you had been aiming for it for over a decade. Now you've achieved it, but from my perspective, I can't understand why you're hesitating... If you want to be close, say it; if you want to hug, say it. Just tell her directly, and your wife will surely respond to your request."

    "Ah... yes, that's true."

    Zhao Yicheng clenched his fists and lifted his face to the cold wind, hoping it would soothe the burning turmoil within him, to no avail. The hottest part of his body refused to calm down, increasing his irritation. Soon, a servant presented the liquor, but Zhao Yicheng stared at the flask for a while before abruptly standing up and striding away from the star-gazing balcony.

    "Hey, Big Brother, where are you going? What about the liquor?"

    "I'm going back to ask my wife," Zhao Yicheng shouted back without turning around. "To hell with it!"

    "May you find success and satisfaction as you desire," Zhao Yongkang raised his flask in a toast, then chuckled and looked up at the stars, swearing to himself he wouldn’t end up like his big brother.

    "It's too much... What a headache."