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Chapter 2

Being a Child Customarily

September began along with Pimploy's internship. The company she had to go to was located in one of the most traffic-congested areas in the country. The young mother meticulously dressed up for the first time in a year to create a good first impression on everyone.

A fitted light-colored shirt paired with a fashionable black pencil skirt that extended past her knees, slightly heeled shoes, and her hair tied up high to make herself seem agile. It matched her light makeup. She focused on making her lips moist and seem youthful. Her overall image was neat. She maintained a simple countryside style, just as she intended.

She did not want to stand out from the very first day. She didn’t love being looked at. The young woman simply wanted to participate in her internship and get it over with. Therefore, she started with a slightly old-fashioned style. If anything was needed, she could add it later. Otherwise, she might overshadow others. Starting from zero and gradually increasing seemed more pleasing than starting at ten and then plummeting down. Besides, her colleagues would see her as someone with growth. There was nothing to lose.

From her research on the internet, Velonica was a company and publishing house that printed a magazine called Velonica. It was one of Thailand’s leading magazines, showcasing the most up-to-date and modern fashion sets compared to other media in the country. It served as a channel for brands to present their work, especially new brands. If a set of clothes managed to secure a full-color double-page spread in the magazine, it could be considered a debut into the industry.

But what Pimploy was curious about was why there was no one competing for a great place like this? How did it end up available for her? Perhaps working for a magazine did not match the likings of many people.

Pailin sat watching her mother turn left and right in front of the wardrobe mirror. The slender figure was dressed in an unusual, neat style. If she added glasses, she could be a strict schoolteacher.

Or maybe, her mother couldn’t see the thin line between old-fashioned and a neat beauty.

“My dear daughter, you'll be staying with Aunt Im a little later in the evenings during this time.” Pimploy walked and sat down next to her daughter. She packed the sharpened colored pencils into a box and swept the other supplies into Pailin’s pink backpack. “Say ‘okay.’ Talk to Mommy a bit.”

“Okay,” Pimploy spoke as a lead.

“Okie,” Pailin pretended to speak in a slight unclear manner, smiling at her mother with the tenth level of cute acting.

“Very good. Next week, Mommy will take you for a photoshoot, okay?” Pimploy tied her daughter’s hair into two buns, stroking the stray strands to put them in place, pleased that her daughter looked like a little Chinese girl in animated movies. “A big brother is going to take pictures of us. You met him yesterday.”

“Taking pic-sure?” Pailin tilted her head.

"Yes, dear. This way, the two of us will have beautiful pictures together," the young woman replied. She was not the type to be so possessive of her daughter that no one could touch or photograph her. It was a good thing—she would get beautiful pictures to frame and hang. A good photographer was not easy to find, and taking selfies herself did not guarantee a good result. Her daughter was this adorable—what was the harm in letting others see her for a bit?

Pailin smiled and adjusted her hair buns. Pimploy walked over to turn off the lights and unplug devices in the room. Then, the mother and daughter headed downstairs together.

After dropping Pailin off with Aunt Im, Pimploy took a motorcycle taxi to the train station. Five stops later, she arrived at her internship location. The modern style building was towering, outstanding, and majestic. The gray building had wooden lattices, hiding small gardens of multiple floors from people’s sights. She had to take the escalator down and walk a bit further to reach the place.

The revolving glass door entrance was grand. Just the entrance alone was decorated like a European-style hotel. Pimploy immediately felt a chill at her upper arms. She took a deep breath and stepped inside. Inside, it was so quiet that the only sound seemed to be the sound of her high heels.

The lobby was three stories high, with crystal chandeliers beautifully hanging. Around the building were trees and solid fences, completely cutting the surroundings off from the outside world.

Pimploy walked straight to the reception desk, where a honey-skinned woman was seated.

"Excuse me," Pimploy spoke. But when the young woman looked up, she was taken aback.

If she were to use an impolite word, ‘weird’ would be quite right. However, if she had to speak in a more polite way, she must use the word ‘unique’… What kind of a normal person would paint their lips gold and wear a snake-print dress that left their long neck bare? Besides, she also styled her hair like Cleopatra. Wait a minute… were those sphinx-shaped earrings? Pimploy stared at them while maintaining her smiley face.

The receptionist gave her a beautiful smile. Her large, round eyes had thick lashes, they were like those of Middle Eastern descent. The gaze of the women showed nothing but a big welcome. Even as she spoke to Pimploy, the angle of the smile at the corner of her mouth barely shifted.

"May I ask what you’re here for?"

"I'm a university student. Here to contact about my internship," Pimploy replied, handing over her prepared documents.

"Alright. Miss Pimploy Kamonanan, intern. Please wait a moment, a female staff will escort you to the 10th floor." She returned the documents to Pimploy. "Velonica welcomes you."

Pimploy stood idly for a moment before a middle-aged woman, dressed in formal black attire with a small hat on her head, called her. "Miss Pimploy, this way, please." The woman gestured with her hand and led her with a smiley face, bringing her to the 10th floor.

The elevator doors opened. Pimploy was led to a certain door, and when the door was opened, she discovered that...

‘The receptionist downstairs was still considered underdressed.’

“...”

Pailin, at a little over one year old, was the mascot of the ‘Imjai Smooth Ironing’ shop. She was posing for pictures with university students picking up their clothes. By now, the shop’s check-in history was filled entirely with photos of the little kid. But today was different from other days. The young girl was especially irritated because the contestant she had been rooting for in a singing competition had been eliminated, and the show was continuing on that television—while she had no way of changing the channel.

‘Irritated. Extremely dissatisfied,’ Pailin complained in her mind.

Aunt Im had stepped out to hang laundry at the side of the building—three baskets—leaving Pailin inside the shop. However, she didn’t forget to hang up a "temporarily closed" sign and lock the door. Truthfully, what Aunt Im had done wasn’t quite right, because if it had been any other child, they would have fallen off the sofa or climbed a cabinet and plunged down, breaking their neck. But fortunately, she was Little Pailin. Though her body was that of a child, her mind was that of an adult. Pailin Kamonanan...?

What else could a brilliant child like her do while her guardian was away, if not...

...steal a smartphone to use!!

Aunt Im was not very knowledgeable about technology. The only application she used was LINE. Most of her messages consisted of "Good Morning" images for Monday through Sunday. The photo folder contained a few pictures of Pailin, as expected from someone who loved to show off. Other than that, it was filled with unedited front-facing selfies. Even Facebook was still in its default version that came with the phone—never once logged into any account.

She had to thank a well-known mobile network company for decreasing the price for a large-screen phones and including a monthly internet package. Otherwise, this phone would be no different from Nokia 3310.

The little girl pressed to update Facebook and logged in using the ID of Passorn—her identity that had already died.

Ordinary people had secret groups to discuss specialized topics. Of course, actors and actresses had them too. Pailin used her chubby fingers to type into the search box: ‘Casting Thai Star’. A private group visible only to members appeared in the search results. This group consisted of actors and actresses who weren’t very famous, had little work, but wanted to secure a gig. Back when she was a dream-chasing teenager, she had joined it. Most of the postings were for extras or minor advertising roles.

Members of the group couldn’t make their own posts but could interact through the comment section. Every topic was news about a search for actors, actress, female leads for music videos, extras. There were times and dates of the castings, and there were instructions for submitting resumes for consideration.

Yes... Passorn had the intention to return to the industry in Pailin’s body for multiple reasons. First, to improve the life of her mother in this lifetime. Second, to find her father in this lifetime. Maybe one day, she would be lucky enough to learn who it was that had wished for her death.

Pailin upheld the principle that she must live a life with a goal. Even if, in the future, there might be something that changed her determination, Pailin still felt it was better than living day by day like a real newborn child. No matter what fate had destined, Pailin believed… that this was an opportunity granted by the heavens. She would make the most of it.

Great success… The journey is always difficult!!

She studied the current market for a while, storing some job-related information in her mind. Then, she entered a celebrity gossip page. The first piece of news made her narrow her beautiful-colored eyes, feeling instantly heated. What was this about Dakarnda having one-year-old twin boy and girl, the same age as her? You venomous snake!!! Her job. The man who should have been hers. And she even had two adorable children.

‘Hmph. What merit has she done, and what sin have I committed?’ Pailin breathed forcefully out of sadness. She was no longer Passorn. The feeling of standing from afar, watching famous people—it felt like this. Whether she liked them or hated them, she couldn’t reach them.

Feeling slightly downhearted, it was almost time for Aunt Im to return.

Pailin logged out of Facebook and placed the phone back where it was.

Sitting idly for a moment, she started worrying about her mother. It was her first day of internship—she didn’t know how it was going, but she would have a headache for sure. The Velonica was filled with artistic people, especially the editor-in-chief.

It was more than being artistic… The person was insane…

Pimploy was led into a certain room. It resembled the office of someone with a higher position than the common people outside. To be honest, the young woman was very astonished by the atmosphere in this place. From the moment she stepped through the door, it felt as if she had entered a place that was no longer in Thailand.

...Yes, it was like a simulated workspace community transplanted from a foreign country. The air conditioning on the entire floor was set to below twenty degrees. What was even stranger was that all thirty-plus people were dressed in winter fashion, walking pass others, with the sound of ringing phones never ceasing. Pimploy had to dodge a man who was running toward the photocopier.

Back inside the room—behind a simple, elegant desk sat a man in a long suit. His face was clean, his eyes lined in black. His eyelids were emphasized with eyeshadow. He had his black hair cut short. There were five hoop earrings on his ears, radiating a scary aura. Pimploy felt as if she was being observed from head to toe—and then from toe to head—twice over.

“Please, sit.” The man before her had exceptionally beautiful hands. He flicked his wrist swiftly, signaling for the young woman to take the seat in front of him.

Pimploy could sense a certain kind of scary energy emanating from him. It gave of a feeling of having to sit on a judgment seat to decide a punishment she didn’t know what it was for.

“Introduce yourself.” The young man spoke, placing his hands together gracefully over his crossed knee.

His voice was so gentle. Pimploy couldn’t stop herself from thinking about it. The man before her was a ‘lady’ who gave off the aura of a ‘husband.’ Even a straight woman like her, hearing his voice made she feel as if her heart skipped a beat.

“My name is Pimploy. I’m from Z University. These are the documents from my university.” The young woman slid the documents onto the desk, feeling a slight tremor in her fingertips.

“I hope you’ve done your research thoroughly before choosing to intern at this company,” the young man said.

“Yes.” Pimploy smiled as she faced it. However, the young man sitting across from her narrowed his eyes.

“Or... perhaps you’ve only studied it on a surface level.” The young man continued, his cherry-colored lips curling into a cold smile. “Tell me—when you walked in, how did you feel? Tell me…” He paused rhythmically. “Straightforwardly.”

“Uh…” Pimploy hesitated. It seemed like every word she could come up in her head didn’t fall under the category of good words.

Bang!!

The young man slammed the desk loudly. “Don’t be afraid to speak!!”

The young woman flinched but managed to hide such demeanor in time. “I felt that... it is pleasantly strange.”

“That’s it.”

His voice became soft once again. “Don’t be afraid to express your feelings. That is rule number one for being here.” He slowly rubbed the head of the ring on his middle finger before continuing. “Allow me to introduce myself—I am Inglit Bluke, lead editor of Velonica magazine. And you, Miss Pimploy…”

“Yes?”

“Do you know what Velonica means?”

“I don’t. But I do know it’s not an English word.” She replied. She was very confident, because she had searched and found nothing.

“Correct. Velonica is Greek. It means ‘bringing victory’!!” He paused and stared at her face. “If you want to work here, you must possess the personality of someone who does not lose. Do things that are creative, invent new things, and stop being repetitive.”

Pimploy swallowed her saliva. She had to reply softly, “Yes.”

“The people outside dress strangely—that is not wrong. You dress neatly and formally—that is not wrong. But try thinking about this: does the way you dress inspire anyone? If everyone dressed like you, that would be suppressing imagination and freedom of thought, covering up the colors in each other’s lives.” The young man smiled.

“The strangeness you speak of—I ask that you change your mindset and call it inspiration.”

“I’ll end my conversation with you here. Today, you may go home. But tomorrow, when you return, I expect that you will be one of those who inspire others.” The young man gestured with his hand once more. “Please, go ahead.”

Pimploy bid farewell in confusion, walking absentmindedly as if hypnotized. Before she realized it, she was already standing outside the building. The young woman glanced left and right to regain her senses before heading toward the train station. Looking at the clock—only an hour had passed.

Sigh... Out of nowhere, she suddenly missed her daughter.

Today, Little Pailin woke up early, feeling especially excited. And why was that...? Because it was her scheduled photoshoot day. Just imagine how cute she must be to have someone ask her to model at only a year and a half old. Thank you, accumulated good karma from all past lives. Thank you, Mom, for raising me well. Thank you, Dad, for selecting premium-grade chromosomes for me.

After that day when her mother had told her that she would return late but ended up returning so early and taking the little girl out to shop, throughout the past week, Pailin’s mother had seemed eager to go to work. The next day, her mother went to work. At first, she seemed tense, but later on, she dressed to the nines as if she were heading to the North Pole. But never mind—the little girl’s daily life hadn’t changed. Only, her mother, who normally liked to find time to lie lazily, had started to become a little more hardworking.

A good thing was how her mother brought stacks of who-knows-what magazines. So, the girl could flip through them to kill her boredom. The scent of the room, which was once clean, had now turned into the smell of a library. It was a musty scent which resembled that of a mold. Umm... never mind.

Little Pailin was very happy that she was starting to escape from looking like a Michelin doll dangling from a tour bus. The segmented rolls of a baby’s body had begun to fade as her limbs stretched out. The one who used to resemble a chubby baby beside a bottle of soy sauce when she slept could now roll over and flip by herself.

Today, Pailin wore a new outfit that Pimploy had just ordered from an online shopping site. A denim overall dress, a black-and-white horizontal striped shirt underneath, sneakers with wings, wavy hair let loose, and a fair, radiant face that made her odd-colored eyes even more beautiful and pleasant to look at. When one is a child, the part on the face that people focus on the most is the eyes. And in this, Pailin had a significant advantage over many other kids.

Pimploy had arranged for the photographer to meet at a public park—a place with flower gardens and fields of grass flowers, the most picturesque setting for a shoot. The scheduled photographer was someone she was quite close to—a junior from her university. They had worked together two or three times before. Two of those times had been portfolio-building photoshoots, and the other was for an online store’s fashion shoot.

"Mother," Pailin called out to Pimploy. Recently, she had introduced a new vocabulary word. And the first word she chose was, of course, Mother.